Next time you catch yourself judging somebody on their circumstances, their life, their choices..remember we all have a story.  

 

Don’t question a women’s desire for more children when she already has one, two, a few. Maybe this women grew up a single child or from a small family and craves a large family for her own.

 

Don’t question the woman who has no children and no desire to. A women is not selfish for not wanting children. She has her own reasons that don’t warrant your opinions. 

 

Don’t ask a pregnant woman if her pregnancy was planned. I answered this yesterday for the tenth time and my answer will always be yes. God planned for this child. A simple congratulations will do or nothing at all if you feel the urge to judge my situation. 

 

What if her pregnancy wasn’t planned? It doesn’t necessarily mean that baby is unwanted and her family isn’t excited.  What if it brings up shame in the mother that it truly wasn’t planned and nothing she wants to discuss with you. You may think it’s a harmless questions, and myself..well I think it’s simply rude. 

 

And when exactly is the perfect child bearing age? Because at one point with my first born, I was too young, but now too old? The perfect age is not determined by others opinions. It is Gods timing. 

 

Maybe the women you consider old has been trying for years. Dealing with infertility? Medical treatments, loss. And maybe that’s a story they don’t want to share due to your judgmental question. Or they were waiting until more financial stability. Or until they found a suitable partner. We do not know a women’s story, nor should we ask. 

 

No women needs to hear their biological clock is ticking or that their eggs are dying. 

 

It’s very easy to view others circumstances through your lens of personal experience. However, this is where unnecessary judgements come into play. We never know others reasons and we should never attempt to change their minds or make them feel inferior. 

 

Family planning…pregnancy…parenting.  

 

Your decision. I’m certain the women not planning on having children or the one who wants more, has made their decision based on much thought and intent into their why. So let’s refrain from all the unnecessary questions and focus on ourselves.